thank you! My brother(s) are both doing extremely well thanks. Having been through what we did, somehow made us incredibly strong, and getting back up again, and again after being knocked down builds up an amazing resilience and fortitude that no one person now, in Scientology can ever break through! The key is positivity and love of family. It is also an utter and blind determination that nothing like this will ever come between us again.
Wow. That is quite a story Vumba, thanks! Please, as more bits come to light, and more details emerge, add them to this thread. That "era" in Scientology is heavily (overly?) romanticized, and, as you know, became the template for a repressive, controlling and destructive cult. So the more light that can be shed on that era, the better.
For example, LRH's focus on hygiene for the ship was probably "a good thing" given the comings and goings of so many "random particles", but the extreme to which it was taken borders on the unbelievable.
On a personal note, how is your brother doing? How did you and your family "find the exit", so to speak?
Again, much thanks for this post!
Hi and thanks. Yes I totally and utterly agree! There was (and still is) a complete realisation that nothing will get that bad again, and this means that our confront levels are very high, and our coping mechanisms are heightened when confronted with life's relatively minor challenges when compared to those in the SO days. My anger towards the regime is very clean when I say "how dare they"! HOW DARE THEY and be allowed to get away with, still even todayN hence my motivation for telling my story and joining this site.Vumba, when I finally left the SO I felt wonderfully liberated. What was most exhilarating though was to know that I didn't have to be afraid of anything for the rest of my life because the worst had already happened to me. I hope the same is true of you.
When I read this, I shuddered... not only because it is just such an appalling thing to have happen to any child, but also because my own family came so close to the same fate. I thank the powers that be for avoiding that!
There are just no words really, your courage is immense and you write it beautifully. It's a sad and violent way to start a young life and I can only imagine the struggles you have had over the years coming to terms with it all and working out what was 'normal' and what was not! Your mother obviously suffered awfully as well and the thought of a 6 month pregnant woman being dumped on a mattress at Stonelands is so disgusting, as is a child in the bloody chain locker. When I think of the things good hearted people endured in the name of 'saving the planet'.... again. Thanks Sue. I have written some more that covers the rape incident but it didn't copy across so I need to redo it. I feel good about writing it up finally and really hope peope who need to know get to read all our posts.
I will post more soon and thank you again.
Looking forward to the next chapter!
cooooool...
listen sweetheart, CoS is a melange of light and dark. psychiatry is vastly reformed since the publication of DMSMH and the work of students of ron's work have been instrumental in undoing horror far beyond the very worst that ever happened on the apollo.
ron is one strange dude, definitely one of a kind. THANK YOU very much for the witness you have borne for us and for posterity
did you wind up having a relationship with your father?
Hi Angelo. I knew an Angelo on the OEC\FEBC at Flag? Thanks so much for your reply. Yes thanks we have all done really well and coped in this "scary wog world" ). But all somehow more resilient and so much stronger for our ordeals, with a good strong work ethic! Oh dear it sounds like going through the ordeal was a good thing! I jest.. No all is well in the land of WogIncredible story. Thanks for posting it. I hope you and your family have come to terms with that terrible time and healed mentally and spiritually. You are a survivor.
Thank you! We are all survivors! my story doesn't end there, it did get worse, but I got up again, dusted myself off, held my head up high and I am still here! Never let the bastards get you down,whoop whoop!You're awsome Vumba, you have quite the spirit and character and you can take a punch.
Going back to the Apollo for a moment, one must never forget a young boy, about the same age as me at aged 12 who was locked up on LRH’s orders in the twin screw locker room at the aft of the ship. We are not talking about a “safe” place at all, just a ledge in a loud, noisy screw room where you could see the water churning below. I know his name, but to protect his identity will not mention it here in case he should wish to do this himself one day. He was screaming and shouting to be let out. He was imprisoned against his will, and absolutely terrified. How long he was in there, I have no ideas, but ethics was being meted out I can tell you!! Wherever you are L, I do so hope you made it and are happy.
When I hear music from the 1970’s, I am reminded just how much our childhood was taken away from us. We never got to experience what it was like to be a real teenager, to go to nightclubs, have a drink in a pub, date people our own age, dress up and have fun. I was yanked out of school in the middle of my ‘A’ levels to work for the GO for Judy Tampion. Over the years, as I have dated men who never had anything to do with Scientology and hear about their teenage years, and my teenagehood bears no resemblance to theirs in any way, shape or form. Another aspect to all of this was that sex before marriage was frowned upon, and the single women and girls slept in dormitories, as did the single men and boys. Married couples had their own rooms. After I had been back at Stonelands from the Ship for a couple of years, I had my first relationship at aged 14. He was in his 20’s! The relationship was not stamped upon, but we were told that I was not to go to a pub or be seen out in public with him as it would be bad PR. The illicitness of the relationship was exciting, but being so young I didn’t realise the implications and dangers of getting involved with someone so much older than me and me being so young. It ended up with my being raped. I was so ashamed and scared of getting into trouble with the Ethics Officer (I think it was Monica Quirino at the time), that I didn’t tell a soul. I was in a lot of pain as I had been sodomised, and had been pinned down by the perpetrator as he was skilled in martial arts and I had no chance at all of getting away. Needless to say, the only way it eventually came out was that he had got married soon afterwards, and confessed to his wife. She was an American lady who came back from the States from whence he had ended up and told my mother. However, despite this, nothing was ever done about it. I started dating someone a little time later, and he was very good to me, but left to go to GOLD so the relationship came to an end, but if it weren’t for him, I am not sure how I would have recovered from the original ordeal! I am not sure I ever told him about what had happened to me, but nevertheless he gave me the support I needed at the time, albeit unknowingly.
There is more to relate, but I will take a breather for a wee bit. Thank you for reading our story.
Going back to the Apollo for a moment, one must never forget a young boy, about the same age as me at aged 12 who was locked up on LRH’s orders in the twin screw locker room at the aft of the ship. We are not talking about a “safe” place at all, just a ledge in a loud, noisy screw room where you could see the water churning below. I know his name, but to protect his identity will not mention it here in case he should wish to do this himself one day. He was screaming and shouting to be let out. He was imprisoned against his will, and absolutely terrified. How long he was in there, I have no ideas, but ethics was being meted out I can tell you!! Wherever you are L, I do so hope you made it and are happy.
When I hear music from the 1970’s, I am reminded just how much our childhood was taken away from us. We never got to experience what it was like to be a real teenager, to go to nightclubs, have a drink in a pub, date people our own age, dress up and have fun. I was yanked out of school in the middle of my ‘A’ levels to work for the GO for Judy Tampion. Over the years, as I have dated men who never had anything to do with Scientology and hear about their teenage years, and my teenagehood bears no resemblance to theirs in any way, shape or form. Another aspect to all of this was that sex before marriage was frowned upon, and the single women and girls slept in dormitories, as did the single men and boys. Married couples had their own rooms. After I had been back at Stonelands from the Ship for a couple of years, I had my first relationship at aged 14. He was in his 20’s! The relationship was not stamped upon, but we were told that I was not to go to a pub or be seen out in public with him as it would be bad PR. The illicitness of the relationship was exciting, but being so young I didn’t realise the implications and dangers of getting involved with someone so much older than me and me being so young. It ended up with my being raped. I was so ashamed and scared of getting into trouble with the Ethics Officer (I think it was Monica Quirino at the time), that I didn’t tell a soul. I was in a lot of pain as I had been sodomised, and had been pinned down by the perpetrator as he was skilled in martial arts and I had no chance at all of getting away. Needless to say, the only way it eventually came out was that he had got married soon afterwards, and confessed to his wife. She was an American lady who came back from the States from whence he had ended up and told my mother. However, despite this, nothing was ever done about it. I started dating someone a little time later, and he was very good to me, but left to go to GOLD so the relationship came to an end, but if it weren’t for him, I am not sure how I would have recovered from the original ordeal! I am not sure I ever told him about what had happened to me, but nevertheless he gave me the support I needed at the time, albeit unknowingly.
There is more to relate, but I will take a breather for a wee bit. Thank you for reading our story.
About 4 years ago, when I had just left the cult, I had an exchange of emails with John Duignan, who I had known while I was in the SO.
John said something about wanting to get the cult shut down and that he expected that I wanted this too.
At the time I thought “Actually no, I don’t particularly want to shut the CoS down. I don’t have any objection to people practising Scientology per se, and if they want to organise themselves into a ‘church’, then fine, let them do it.”
Well, of course John was in the Sea Org a lot longer than I was and he saw a lot more of the abuses and especially how children were treated. But even so, I didn’t necessarily agree with him on this point.
Now I have changed my mind.
Not just now, but this reinforces my reversal of opinion. The so called ‘Church’ of Scientology has to be dismantled. Anything that can allow, no, cause something like this to happen not once, but probably hundreds of times, cannot be salvaged.
What sort of evil takes over a person so that they think children barely in their teens can be sent away from everyone they know, including their family to work on a ship where ordinary laws don’t apply. Where children can be locked in a chain locker or the screw compartment for the most minor of offences? Or where a child is raped and the first thought is not to give love and support to the victim, but to think of how it can be covered up so it won’t harm your ‘church’?
Truly despicable. Any organisation that can breed this sort of thinking doesn’t deserve to survive and in fact should be humanely put down as a warning to all those other fanatical groups who feel that they are ‘the chosen’.
Whenever I think about writing my story, I read something like this and I think, “Huh, what have you got to complain about?” I wasted some of the best years of my life, spent close to £100K and I got off lightly. Vumba is only a few years older than I am and if my parents had got sucked into the cult around this time, this could have been me. Or what if I had had children and they had been stolen into the Sea Org?
No, I got off lightly.
Axiom142
Thank you for your reply. I want the people who doubt how sadistic LRH could be, to read all of our stories and try to defend them! The truth is the truth. Whilst we were being locked up, restrained, deprived, LRH was receiving his caviar and champagne and going out on shore parties on his Harleys!Hi Vumba, thank you very, very much for telling your story. There are so many people who believe the crap about "the good old days when Hubbard was in charge" that it's more important than ever that people who were THERE tell the truth about what really happened.
Harmless religion, my ass. I wonder what that heap o' crap Hubbard was doing while you were being violently attacked right there on his ship.