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Ex- scn from NYC comm

Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by Click, Jan 7, 2017.

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  1. Click

    Click Patron

    In the late 90's I studied in manhattan at celebrity centre the person who ran celebrity centre was a woman named steph. Of all the purported celebrities issac Hayes was the only one I came across. Life was tough after moving to NYC from Seattle with hopes of making it big, it became much harder upon enrolling in Scientology after taking a personality test. I became a Scientologist because the courses were discounted to members.

    the female auditor told me that I wasn't sexually aggressive towards women and that Scientology could help. The first course taught me to create, create in order to succeed, nothing to do with the original reason for taking the course. The class ended with us giving "wins", then more courses. In the end known of the courses helped.

    Money that I scarcely had went into further study, starting with TR drills which taught me to be manipulative and two faced. Actually we were taught to never say anything negative about someone else or respond negatively.

    when all was said and done I had a nervous breakdown and moved into a flop house in the Bowery of manhattan. Suffering from despair, it struck me odd that scn was to help me develop charisma as well as communication decorum needed for my career. While on casting calls my agent was informed of my disingenuousness. Did anyone else discover their personality changed after scn courses?
  2. This is NOT OK !!!!

    This is NOT OK !!!! Gold Meritorious Patron

    Welcome to the board.

    Stick around and read up on the many stories of how Scientology changed people - all for the worse.

    Hope things are OK now.
  3. WildKat

    WildKat Gold Meritorious Patron

    After being in the SO one year, I found myself being unsympathetic to those down on their luck or who were victims. You start to believe that people are always responsible for their condition and so it's of no use giving aid to the poor or helping victims. They just "pulled it in". And if they were robbed and beaten in this lifetime, they must have been the perpetrator of a similar crime last lifetime. Scn squeezes compassion out of people over time.

    So while Hubbard was claiming to make the world better, he was creating "no sympathy" heartless people who wouldn't bother going to a family funeral because "it's just a body" and there's more important work to be done.
    strativarius likes this.
  4. Knows

    Knows Gold Meritorious Patron

    SPOT ON CLICK: TR drills which taught me to be manipulative and two faced.

    Welcome Click! Thanks for sharing your story. YES - Scientology causes despair and strips one of of their identity. It is a total mind fuck. Just taking a few courses can lead a person to make mistakes. The information has poison mixed into some truths.

    It starts with the lie that we have a "spritual tone level". Where is the science? No proof of that at all.

    It is a mind fuck and you total recover from deliver blows to Scientology (expose it) and getting fully educated as to the "identity, thoughts and beliefs" they implanted into your brain / mind.

    You can fully recover - but it takes some effort.

    Expose Scientology - post on blogs, get people out, protest an org - whatever you can do to feel "at cause" and get rid of all fear associated with exposing Scientology.
    Get Educated
    Take Care of yourself
    Read other stuff to displace the Scientology "tech"

    You can practice meditation and learn to control your thoughts a bit too.

    Love yourself - you were a human being that got trapped by an evil cult that has perfected mind manipulation. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG! You were a victim but raise yourself up - give yourself a hug and keep going!
  5. dchoiceisalwaysrs

    dchoiceisalwaysrs Gold Meritorious Patron

    Welcome Click
    You might want to read Hubbard's "Admissions" to see why Scientology's purpose is to change you into a different person.
    I would draw your attention to the part where he is self hypnotizing to have ' all as his slaves' and how his philosophy will control others.
    Such is what Scientology became as he was driven by that self installed manic of very sociopathic postulates.
    Whatever knowledge brought into the Dianetics and Scientology movements which seen as effective tools towards mind and other manipulation on Hubbard's targets are the meat of those two subjects.
    Good luck in your life. Be aware of those who are shysters claiming to help, they have a goal to help themselves to whatever portion of you life they can, often very astutely done, for their sole aggrandizement.
  6. Click

    Click Patron

    I was given incentives to lower the course fee by bringing in new members for courses. However every person who I brought in was declared a DB and it affected me negatively, since afterwards scn admin ostracized me. Is anyone aware of any rulings to penalize members for bringing in DB'?
  7. GE cmdr

    GE cmdr Patron with Honors

    I would say that the tech changed me for the better, i will still swear by it. Before all my training and processing, i don't think i would have had the wits to be able to see everything that was wrong.
  8. PirateAndBum

    PirateAndBum Gold Meritorious Patron

    To see everything that was wrong with what exactly?
  9. GE cmdr

    GE cmdr Patron with Honors

    Scientology and how it was being used.
  10. PirateAndBum

    PirateAndBum Gold Meritorious Patron

    Sure, that makes sense. Unless you know what it was supposed to be like (in theory) you'd not likely see the inconsistencies, nor would you see the inconsistencies in Hubbard's own writings.
  11. JustSheila

    JustSheila Crusader

    One of the many ironies of Scientology is we come out of it better able to recognize frauds, but not instantly accepting the fact that we were completely taken in and the whole thing was a fraud.

    It's a bit hard on the self-esteem to admit to being so completely wrong and naive.:yes:
  12. GE cmdr

    GE cmdr Patron with Honors

    Meh, i can admit to that much.
  13. WildKat

    WildKat Gold Meritorious Patron

    For most of us, it was an age thing. We got in when we were young....idealistic....gullible. That's why the cult goes after the young.

    I think we can excuse the young for being idealistic and gullible. I was going to say that it's the parents responsibility to keep their kids out of cults. But then I didn't work for me either! When my mom tried to warn me away, I rebelled, and stayed in for at least a decade before I finally admitted she was right!

    So add "rebellious" to the list. Idealistic, gullible, and rebellious toward parental authority.
  14. Tuppence

    Tuppence Patron

    I found (growing up in Scientology), it was hard on the self esteem in many ways, but I was also taught how to deal with a lot of it too.

    The hard part for me was the idea that if I caught a cold or flu it was because I was bad, I got the impression (after LRH's death) that Scientology regarded life as a punishment. We are theatens "scentenced" to pay for our crimes. That's why we have these coporial bodies and until we serve out the sentence or become at least Clear or better Yet an OT, we are doomed to come back again and again. Reincornation in a Salvador Dahli painting.

    I find it interesting how many high ranking Scientology members have been declared scince LRH's death, the stories of abuse by DM tells me he's not in a state of Clear, nor are any of his underlings if they just take it.

    I may be wrong, but as I recall there are many useful tips and teachings from Scientology of old. DM has just kindly edited all of LRH's materials to allow him to manipulate and change it's meaning and the good it can do. But I grew up in the 80s and recall some of the teachings that worked. I find they still work, in the right situation.

    I would also like to say, Scientology does not endorse (don't think it ever did) sympathy. It's useless, but I was taught to empathize, witch is a much more useful skill. Difference, sympathy is not that different from pitty, feeling bad for someone or sorry for them. Empahty is understanding what they could be thinking, feeling and WHY they feel what they feel.

    It sounds to me as though you got the DM version of Scientology though.
  15. ThetanExterior

    ThetanExterior Gold Meritorious Patron

    Tuppence, I know you're new here but you seem to be pushing the "LRH good, DM bad" idea that we've seen many times before.

    If you spend some time here and on other scientology-related websites I'm sure you will find that abuses by LRH are many and well documented. Even the abuses committed by DM are usually justified by quoting LRH references that make them ok.

    Yes, DM is bad but so was LRH. They are two of a kind.
  16. Tuppence

    Tuppence Patron

    I was not trying to say that LRH was a saint, just that things became even worse under DM there was a change in scientology. DM has edited Dinentics (?) and changed its meaning, he's edited other materials put out by LRH. You will notice Theaten Exterior, I shared some things I had a hard time with from before DM. They may be two monsters cut from the same cloth, they may be two very different beasts, that would be a moot point.

    Maybe I'm too early in the healing to see what you've seen, but I feel Scientology has both positive and negitive points, as does Christianity and any other religion. I did not mean to cause any confrontation issues, nor did I mean to touch on any sore spots and if I have I appologize for that, I just meant to share 1) where I am at right now, 2) things I had personally observed. Not things reported, but I personally experienced. I am at the begining of this journey, and perhaps I will find as you suggest there really is no difference, maybe I will. This I think is part of the process, if I'm not the first to say these things and it's something other people had discovered to be false.

    Please respect this is a journey I'm on too, and I need to do this at my pace, perhaps I'm wrong and in timeI will see that, perhaps I won't and forgive me when I stumble or faulter, perhaps you know what you know from what you've seen, perrhaps it's influenced by the experiences of others. Maybe it's a combination of the two, but I need to process this and as I do not have anybody around me willing to talk about Scientology, I need to come to my own conclusions; right now, I only have my own experiences from almost 30 years ago to guide me.

    If I'm wrong in my thinking that this is a "safe place" to share these thoughts and ideas, I appologize and I will leave
  17. TrevAnon

    TrevAnon Big List researcher

    The ESMB is generally a place where people, especially people new to the board, can find a safe space to share thoughts such as yours.

    That being said it doesn't mean we can't show you other insights (or link to them) than yours which may be a harsh confrontation with the reality that the abuses in the COS started out from the beginning.

    Plox to lurk moar, by e.g. looking at the references in my sig line, and in e.g. . There is VAST amount of proof for what I'm saying here. Sad fact. :(
  18. Tuppence

    Tuppence Patron

    You are correct in saying other people can share

    Perhaps it was there from the begining, as I said I'm not here to natter, bitch or moan about the treatment recieved in COS, I am just starting my journey, so first things first. I'm breaking the scilence which has prevailed about it for the last 30 years.I will be and have been reading other peoples posts I've seen posts which mention my sister and my mother (the poster did get my mother's name wrong) and other small details were inaccurate; having said that I feel I need to break the scilence and I thought this would be a safe place to do that.

    I am not saying suicide, death and abuses have not occured in COS.

    I am saying I'm just starting my journey TrevAnon and if this is what I can expect, or what others can expect don't be surprised if people do not find it helpful and leave instead of uniting, which is what I think is generally wanted in a situation like this.
  19. Enthetan

    Enthetan Master of Disaster

    LRH was able to use charm. Miscavige has to rule entirely by fear.

    Stick around. Speak your mind. It doesn't mean that other people will agree with you, but this I promise: we will never stick you in the chain locker.
  20. Churchill

    Churchill Gold Meritorious Patron

    The robust debate on virtually all things that take place outside of Scientology is somewhat shocking to Scientologists and those newly out of the cookie cutter factory... It gives a new meaning to the empty phrase that delusional Scientologists spout, unaware of the irony....

    Think for yourself.
    Last edited: Oct 16, 2017
    Enthetan likes this.