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What got you in? What made you stay?

Discussion in 'Evaluating and Criticising Scientology' started by Bea Kiddo, Dec 11, 2007.

  1. Pascal

    Pascal Silver Meritorious Patron

    mini me

    I read Mission Earth and loved it. Then read half of book 1 and knew this was for me. All my life people had been bugging me about "my huge potential" and "not using it", I thought book 1 would help me tap into it. Bad news, I was a heavy drug case and could not run book 1. Did TRs galore, got huge wins and realised I was near -30 on the tone scale and that a long road was ahead of me.

    15 years later I got out after a ethics fuck-up while I was training to become the ED of a mission in a new country. RTC didn't bother to save my ass so I realised RTC was incompetent and vowed to reform this SP group.:coolwink:
  2. namaste

    namaste Silver Meritorious Patron

    I guess so. It's not that I was outside of my body but I was viewing everything that was going on mentally with flawless awareness.

    I have been exterior in other ways before and one time, I must admit, it was after smoking some pot.
    I was really feeling cool and uptone and I took a look at my body from about 3 feet or so away and spotted many areas of tension and sort of sickness for lack of a better word and I proceeded to heal them up, at least for the moment.
    I don't remember seeing the back of my head or anything like that though. I was pretty much just looking at everything inside. It was short-lived though and I have not been able to do it to that degree since.
    I haven't smoked at all in many years. I gave it up because I didn't like the burn out that came afterward.

    A couple of other things that were notable about the increased awareness state is that I seemed to have no fear and was aware that I usually did have some type of fear going on. I seemed to be able to relax my face and look right out of those peepholes because of it.
    I also felt that, while in this state, I could do anything that I wanted to. I could move mountains if I so chose.
    There is a great ease and peace of mind that comes with this confidence and self-assuredness.
    I believe that everyone has this potential.

    Thanks for the comments guys.:thumbsup:
  3. namaste

    namaste Silver Meritorious Patron

    I agree that the CoS has totally dropped the ball.
    I have no faith at all any more in this groups ability to help me or anyone else.
    They are too busy acting like they are "tough" as per KSW.
    Very ineffective.

    Good luck, I'm all for that reform. :)
  4. Pascal

    Pascal Silver Meritorious Patron

    Good let's all postulate an ideal scene with no vicious dwarf this time. :happydance:
  5. Terril park

    Terril park Sponsor

    For me going ext is best described as " being 3 feet back of your head".
    I've not had exterior perception. If you were looking at the inside of your body
    that seems to imply a very high ability which possibly included exterior pereption.

    Your comments remind me of something LRH said somewhere about how he met someone who was quite psychotic and gave the command " be three feet back of your head", and she promptly lost the psychosis, I believe just temporarily. Exteriorised from the reactive mind.

    I've only read two success stories of people with exterior perception.
  6. lionheart

    lionheart Gold Meritorious Patron

    I knew some people who were Scientologists and they wouldn't tell me anything about it! Really! :duh: It was a great disssemination technique!

    I wanted to be like them.

    I read DMSMH and decided it was a chance to put the world to rights in the hippy, political days of the 60's.

    I decided to be an auditor.

    I became one. I helped people. I was helped in return and the world was begining to be put right.

    I was scared of the new Sea Org. I wasn't tough enough to join. I was scared of Ron because I thought he sounded nuts, so therefore I must be nuts! I grew to love Ron, he was so amusing, so clever, so, so, so Source! I'd never imagined truth would be so cruel and vindictive, which just showed how little I knew. But Ron was giving me the education that I needed. He turned my wandering doubt into a dedicated glare.

    I got others in, kept them in when they wanted to leave and "helped" them with auditing and training. We were all winning. SP's like Otto Ruess and John McMaster and Paulette Cooper deserved everything that was coming to them and Jane and Mary Sue were doing such a wonderful job of putting ethics in on the planet which need putting to rights.

    Oh what fun it was! The auditing was fantastic and even better when you applied it to others. We WERE going to clear the planet! Yippee!

    So what, if sometimes it was terrible and degrading? Tough, tough tough. No namby pamby theetie weetie stuff here!

    Standard Dianetics - Fantastic!
    Levels and Grades - even better! :happydance:
    New Era Dianetics - well a bit of a code break in there about fishing for a postulate - but, what the heck, LRH said that's what you did and that was good enough for me! :thumbsup:
    Urgh! All this Clear confusion!
    LRH was now expecting World War III and we had to head for the sauna quick!
    Ron knew what he was doing, he did, he really did. Everything was fine, really it was!
    The greatest rundown ever, unlike any other - the exciting, the dynamite Happiness Rundown! A sunny sky and the wondrous wonder of life! Oh what Happiness! Happy forever, just as I had always really been.
    Jesus the CofS undersold what the end result of the tech was! They had cheated me! If only every Scientologist could feel this beauty, this joy, this LIFE! So very funny, so inexpressible!
    Back to delivering auditing. It was mostly HRD now. And EVERYONE loved it! It was just like the promo promised them it would be!
    Now people could even clean up, in session, Scn terminals who violated the precepts. Of course that was often ethics officers or registrars or execs or Ron. But at last we had the tech to sort all the organisational madness out now! Of course they weren't allowed to know what the EP was. That was a good thing, the other grade Chart EPs were a Code break evaluation. Pity they don't know it though, maybe they'd get even more out of the rundown, become even happier!
    But it was wins all round. 100% completions, zero bogs or repairs, fantastic success stories on those exciting, special HRD success story sheets. We were definitely going to clear the planet now thanks to LRH's clever rundown and David Mayo's fantastic assistance.
    These WDC issues from this anonymous, mysterious "committee! were a bit wierd. I thought Ron didn't approve of government by committee? But it didn't matter we had the tech to handle everything!
    Suddenly we all got declared! Every HRD auditor and C/S. All the original HRD completions. Suppressive persons every one of us!
    Alone and scared and so very abandoned. Now the planet would never be put to rights - unless, unless they were right and I was indeed evil! Yes, that must be it, after all, I had done so many bad things. What was the old unconscious conflict I was stuck in fighting? Now I'd never get the mysterious OT Levels and those wonderful Abilities Gained that used to be published on the Grade Chart. I was doomed to be total unknowing effect forever, for the rest of the duration and beyond.
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2008
  7. Tanstaafl

    Tanstaafl Crusader

    I'd like to hear more about that if you've the time and inclination my local friend. :)
  8. Bea Kiddo

    Bea Kiddo Crusader


    Makin' shiny happy people!!!!

    (Something wrong with that picture, eh?)

    Dont mind me. Snide comment about the tech and administration of it...
  9. Tanstaafl

    Tanstaafl Crusader

    I read the full HRD pilot notes many years back.
    It did sound interesting, especially as the colleagues of the PCs were asked to evaluate any changes they'd seen in the PCs since they started the auditing (without being told what they were getting).

    IIRC the most common observation was "looks younger".
    The PCs themselves seemed to talk mostly about blowing valences.

    What was your experience with it Bea? In terms of receiving and delivering.

    Of course, if you looked any younger you'd be asked for ID in bars. :yes: :eyeroll:
  10. nw2394

    nw2394 Silver Meritorious Patron

    HRD was life changing for me.

    Saw a lot of success stories when it was released for general consumption and I recall that a common comment in them was that it "handled my ruin".

    This included people all the way up to those on NOTs. It was good that so many were gettng their ruins handled, though a little outpointy that their ruins had not been properly addressed earlier.

    I understand that later a "does the precept read" was introduced as an added inapplicable calculated to make sure that the RD no longer did anything much.

    I guess so many got declared because it raised personal integrity.

  11. lionheart

    lionheart Gold Meritorious Patron

    Bea, I was, of course, expressing how things felt at the time. At the start middle, end and after my Scn "career". You are allowed your snide comments, as far as I am concerned. Your life in Scn was largely an outcome of foolish feelings like the ones I expressed.

    Tans, I don't know what you want me to say, except to further describe the precious things! :D

    The HRD was different from all other lower level auditing that I studied. It even used an old style of auditing that wasn't on the levels. I think it was different, because it was written and largely developed by David Mayo and not LRH. It was gentler, kinder and granted more beingness to the PC. Theety weety as Vin would call it!

    I seem to remember reading somewhere that "Recognition of the Rightness of the Being" was David's favourite LRH tech issue and that he used to read it when things were hard for him. Or was it "What is Greatness"? I forget.

    Certainly the HRD was styled in that fashion. And "Recognition of the Rightness of the Being" was pivotal to the whole style. Overt running was an absolute joy. So easy for PC and auditor. The verbiage of Ron's "Way to Happiness" booklet was a slight trial for the PC sometimes, but we managed.

    How the steps of the R/D built upon each other was a "tour de force" and the culmination of Valence Splitting was the nearest to poetry that I ever saw the tech get! :thumbsup: Watching the PC drop the valences was beautiful!

    The last few precepts were so magical to run that words cannot describe it.

    People told me I looked different when I returned having completed my own HRD. I've spoken many times on here about the effect that I felt. Quite hard to do when you are talking about the inexpressible!

    As regards the declares. It was inevitable. If you read the WTH booklet and realise that the R/D removed any barriers the person had to applying the precepts and realise how much the CofS and poor Ronnie-baby violated the precepts, you can see how something had to give. The strain between the Chuch's officers and the technolgy that the Church was delivering was unsustainable. Developing the HRD was Mayo's last suppressive act towards the CofS! :happydance:

    I think every one of my HRD PCs ran CofS terminals on their rundown. Sometimes the terminal would pop up on so many precepts that the PC would just laugh and blow the valence on inspection!

    In the light of recent posts about putting the PC "at effect" you can understand how blowing opressive, PT CofS terminals on the case was not something the CofS could allow to happen. It was losing it's control over it's suppressed poopers.

    HRD PC's would laugh and refuse to be regged. They would smile at ethics officers and refuse to obey them.

    So we all got declared! The time-span from R/D release to our declares is only a matter of months.

    How much of these feelings and wins was "real", is another matter. But I've done my best to decribe the precious things.
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2008
  12. Alan

    Alan Gold Meritorious Patron

    Beautiful description Lionheart!

    I also noticed that ALL my pcs on the Happiness R/D ran Scio Terminals as I did also.

    As I said before - I believe this HR/D was the precursor for the Schism in Scio that preceded the Mission Holders events.

    The HRD looked so innocuous - but it had tremendous bite to it :happydance:

  13. Krysti

    Krysti Patron with Honors

    You know, it's weird...

    Reading Namaste's and Lionheart's posts reminds me of when I was manic. It was the best feeling in the world. And I kept saying "I can see things so clearly now". Everything just made sense. It was like I was fully awake for the first time.

    Does anyone have any thoughts on this? Why does the manic side of bipolar seem so similar to the state of mind scientologists describe when speaking of wins or going/being exterior?


  14. Div6

    Div6 Crusader

    Because you are free of the body's electrical are in direct communication with the universe around you (of course as a being you still have problems, overts, withholds, etc) but you are free of the body composite. Naked conciousness. Aware of being aware....Alive.

    The state is unstable and lasts seconds, minutes, hours, days depends...but it acts like a drug in some, and because exteriorization occurs at death, can key in death engrams on all there is liability to exteriorizing people without educating them and further processing in the area.

    Alan has "ascension experience" tech on his web site. It's definitely worth a look as well.
  15. Pascal

    Pascal Silver Meritorious Patron

    It's the same. It's being high on the tone scale. Bipolar people get keyed-in and out dramatically all the time, emotional unstability.
  16. Krysti

    Krysti Patron with Honors

    So, do you think bipolar mania is or could be the same thing as being exterior (as in the way I described it)?

    It's ironic that I take medicine to not be in that state again and scientologists (or others) spend their life trying to achieve or stay in that state.

    How long has anyone (on this forum) ever been in that state? Did you also have periods of being in a really down state (depression)?

    I will take a look at ascension experience.

    Thanks, Div.

  17. Div6

    Div6 Crusader

    1. Possibly. There is quite a distinction to be made, though, about being ext in Present Time, and having an prior forcible ext experience in restimulation (prior deaths, drug incidents, shooting, murders, etc). They can be QUITE uncomfortable as incidents when restimulated.)

    2. I can only answer for myself. My Purification Rundown "end Phenomenon" was going Ext. It lasted for about 2 weeks. When interiorized, yes, I would have my down times...
    But having tasted "freedom" I was willing to put up with a lot (and change a lot of self destructive behavior) to maintain it...and expand upon it.
  18. Tanstaafl

    Tanstaafl Crusader

    LH - thanks for sharing the precious things of the shop! :D
  19. Vinaire

    Vinaire Sponsor

    Very interesting!

    Is the HRD still being delivered by COS?

  20. lionheart

    lionheart Gold Meritorious Patron

    I believe it is being delivered by CofS, but I don't know if it has been altered in any way. I saw an early 80's edition of it and David Mayo's name was taken off it. Otherwise it looked almost the same, apart from the alteration to the TRs.

    I'm not sure if these days, PCs would be free to run PT CofS terminals in the R/D and maybe the HRD is interspersed these days with the usual controlling sec-checks. Bea may be able to tell us.

    Of course sec checks were not allowed to interfere with the HRD in David Mayo's days of the HRD.

    Some people may be interested to know that it took me about 5 years to recover from the declare. But it took more like 20 years to recover from the "wins" of the HRD"! :roflmao:

    Div6. Your explanation to Krysti is interesting. And Alan's Ascension Experience tech is well worth looking at. Personally it doesn't quite indicate to me as regards my experience. but that's fine.