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You are brave, and I salute you all.

Discussion in 'General Scientology Discussion' started by hannahh, Feb 28, 2009.

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  1. hannahh

    hannahh New Member

    I hope I am not intruding; I read that all types of people (including WOGs like me) were welcome to post here, so I took you at your word. I have never belonged to the church, although, many years ago, I did have an unpleasant interlude with it.

    At age eighteen, in the seventies, I walked along Kings Highway in Brooklyn, and soon a handsome young man flirted with me. In a short time, he talked me into taking a "free" personality assessment test. Sure, why not? I thought the test overly personal, and tediously long. The assessment of my personality was uncannily accurate in some places, but not enough to impress me. They sold me a book: "Dianetics." They tried to sell me a course, but I politely demurred. I thought that was the end of it. It certainly was, for me. The book ended up in the trash...it did not interest me very much. I was much more interested in listening to Joni Mitchell, reading "Seth Speaks" and as well as Proust and Wharton. :)

    I was soon bombarded with both phone calls ("are you REALLY happy with your life"?) and letters. Lots of letters. Letters that made references to the personal information I revealed on my questionnaire. That made me angry. After weeks of harassment, I mailed them a scathing letter, threatening legal action if they contacted me again. I thought they were creepy. The letter was self righteous, long and furious. I never heard a peep from them after that. Given what I have read about Scientology, I am very grateful I wrote that letter. Years later, after reading about Scientology, I can't help but believe that I dodged a bullet.

    I found this site after I had been searching for information about a commune my brothers belonged to in the seventies, "Brotherhood of the Spirit." After jumping from site to site, I ended up reading the fascinating story of an ex-scientologist, and the abject hell she had endured for twelve years. Not exactly the same as my brothers' experience in the commune, but with enough similarities to make me take notice. Corrupt and cruel leadership, mind control, regimented groupthink. Not so very different, even though it was on a smaller scale. The Googling for commune information inadvertently brought me here.

    Your stories are moving, profound, and often painful to read. Some of them made me cry. Some made me furious. All touched me deeply. I take my hat off to you, all of you. I can't even begin to fathom the emotions that come with reorienting yourselves into a world you've long felt was evil and dangerous, not to mention the fear that creeps behind you in the shadows. That takes extraordinary strength. I wish all of you serenity, healing, and, most of all, joy.

    Hannahh
     
  2. sallydannce

    sallydannce Gold Meritorious Patron

    Welcome to ESMB hannahh.

    People like you make people like me smile. And smile. So nice to read your words and have you here on ESMB. :thumbsup:
     
  3. Lesolee (Sith Lord)

    Lesolee (Sith Lord) Patron Meritorious

    :welcome:

    You are not intruding.

    You are welcome :happydance:
     
  4. HappyGirl

    HappyGirl Gold Meritorious Patron

    Wow, hannah. Thank you for your kind words, and :welcome:!
    I never heard that Joni Mitchell read Seth speaks. Wasn't that Jane Roberts? I searched Amazon and couldn't find it. Do you have a link to the Joni Mitchell version?
     
  5. AnonOrange

    AnonOrange Gold Meritorious Patron

    Similarly, I dodged the Sci bullet. In 1984, I lived in Tampa and bought Dianetics by calling the Clearwater org. I had no idea what Dianetics was. I read two pages and it didn't make sense to me pretty quick.

    Soon after I started getting phone calls, letters (even long hand written letters), they showed up at my doorstep, etc. I couldn't believe how persistent these people were. I counted 30 attempts at contacting me.

    A few years later I moved to another state, where I met someone that had just lost a small fortune with scientology and explained a lot and where to find info about it.

    Later I knew two German citizens that were pretty messed up by scientology.

    BTW, does anybody know a Karl & Petra (about 32 years old) from the LA birthing center ? (I knew them between 1996 and 1999 or so)
     
  6. Tiger Lily

    Tiger Lily Gold Meritorious Patron

    Hi Hannahh,

    You are absolutely welcome here!! Glad you stopped by! :)

    Yes, you dodged a bullet. Good job sniffing that out so early!:yes: :thumbsup:

    -TL
     
  7. EP - Ethics Particle

    EP - Ethics Particle Gold Meritorious Patron

    Strength in numbers!

    Please stay around, Hannahh! :yes: We need you and your input...and you may well find strengths here that you were not even aware you needed! :whistling: :thumbsup:

    And, by the way - you DID dodge a bullet! :yes: Very well done indeed! :clap:

    EP
     
  8. Telepathetic

    Telepathetic Gold Meritorious Patron

    Welcome Hannahh,

    This would be a wonderful world,if it were full of Hannahhs.:thumbsup:

    Love,

    TP
     
  9. Tim Skog

    Tim Skog Silver Meritorious Patron

    Welcome hannahh, and I am glad you found this board. Your post is very insightful.
     
  10. Iknowtoomuch

    Iknowtoomuch Gold Meritorious Patron

    That was soothing to read. Thanks Hannahh!
     
  11. Markus

    Markus Silver Meritorious Patron

    Welcome!

    Welcome Hannah, nice to meet you.

    Best wishes

    Markus
     
  12. Good twin

    Good twin Floater

    Hi Hannahh. Welcome to ESMB. :flowers:
     
  13. La La Lou Lou

    La La Lou Lou Crusader

    Well Hannahh, that was splendid to read, thankyou for your wonderful sentiments.
    You sound like a spledid human being and a wonderful sister!
    Carry on reading.



    La La Lou Lou
     
  14. Alanzo

    Alanzo Bardo Tulpa

    OK, I swear I'm not a homo. But I cried.

    Thank you for your salute, Hannahh.

    Do you have any sisters?
     
  15. airhead

    airhead Patron with Honors

    Whooo hoooo! You escaped!!

    Well done, Hannahh!

    That makes you one of us!! (You don't have to have scars to be here -- you just have to be OUT... or in, or whatever...) :hug:
     
  16. Wisened One

    Wisened One Crusader

    :welcome: to ESMB, Hannah! Great first post and interesting story, glad you didn't join, I used to be a person that brought people in to do their personality test, too, (and test evaluator). We hated it when people didn't sign up for courses or counselling on the first get-go, geeez, NOW I'm glad I didn't get very many to do so! :thumbsup:

    Michelle
     
  17. hannahh

    hannahh New Member

    thank you kindly.

    What a warm group you are :) Thank you for the warm welcome. Here I am, someone who really can't relate on a personal level to what you've been through, yet you opened your arms. Thank you, you are very gracious folks, in addition to being brave. I probably won't post very much, because I really can't add very much to your discussions. But I did want to delurk and tell you how very much you impacted my heart.

    Yes, I suppose I did dodge a bullet. Certain personality traits that made my childhood (and often, my parents) utterly miserable may have benefited me in other ways. I was rebellious, stubborn, contrary, argumentative and questioned *everything*...taking nothing for granted. I had an authority issue as a kid, as I felt I was brighter than most people. I am not proud of that, and the ensuing years have (thankfully) given me some much-needed humility. I was cynical, even with those glittery stars in my eyes. I remember when my brothers joined "the community" (commune, run by who turned out to be a criminal, greed-monger-masquerading-as-socialist druggie rapist dictator), my father told me he never worried about me and communes because I'd "insist on having room service." ;) Turn my money over to you? You're kidding, right?

    Wizened One Michelle: thank you. I'll bet you did hate that. It is the ABC of sales ("always be closing"), after all. :)

    Airhead: I *do* have some scars, although nothing, absolutely nothing, like yours. My brothers fell victim to a cult organization running under the guise of a commune, and I have sadly watched how it impacted their lives...especially my older brother. He left that awful place thirty years ago, and it still sticks to him like unwanted glue.

    Alanzo: no sisters :) I'm no trip to Paris, and one of me is probably enough. I have a list of people who would ardently agree ;)

    Telepathic: *smooch*

    EP: (great handle) thank you :)

    Happy Girl: there is a comma after Joni Mitchell. As far as I know, she never read Seth Speaks. But she managed to write some of the most beautiful music without him. :)

    Tiger Lily, Sallydance, Lesolee, Airhead, LaLaLaLou, Wizened One, Good Twin, Markus, AnonOrange, Tim: big hugs to you.

    Hannah
     
    Last edited: Mar 2, 2009
  18. FoTi

    FoTi Crusader

    Glad you stopped by, Hannahh. :welcome2:

    Hope you'll hang around.

    I love Joni Mitchell too. I used to wish I could do what she did. I really admired her.
     
  19. Alanzo

    Alanzo Bardo Tulpa

    Wow.

    I feel like we've been visited by an angel.
     
  20. HappyGirl

    HappyGirl Gold Meritorious Patron

    Ah! That pesky comma. :) Love Joni Mitchell. Still listen to her.