Alex P. Keaton
Patron
Some years ago, in the "golden age of video stores", I read a story about a video store that would give you a certificate for "surviving" a series of really, really bad movies. Present your receipts that proved you rented them, and they would give you a funny certificate for "surviving" them.
Has anyone ever made up some funny or sarcastic certificates for "surviving" any of the various CO$ lectures, congresses or services?
Can I still get software to make certificates? There used to be a number of software titles for less than $20 (children could give their father a "World's Greatest Father" certificate for Father's Day for example). Can I still get software for this that runs on Windows 7? (I refuse to go to Win10.)
I could make the certificate say any funny thing I want. I could give myself a certificate -- for "the heroic action of surviving Hubbard's interminable drivel contained in the Clearing Course", or anything else. EDIT: A watermark, perhaps LRH's head (or the Dianetics/SCN double triangle symbol) or maybe even clipart (used sparingly) could enhance the seriousness, humor, etc. of this certificate.
Heck, I could even make a phony Clear Certificate if I felt like it. I could even attest to OT 9 and 10 !!! (I also refuse to use Roman numbers.)
If I write down a list of phrases in a word processor about the wonderful achievement I have achieved, and another list about how bad the CO$ course, lecture or service was, I could make a whole set of certificates.
Has anybody ever tried this?
ANOTHER EDIT: Using Goldenrod-color paper (and some trumped-up offenses), I could even make my own declare. Other people, who were in the CO$ (I never was) could get some nice closure by printing fake declares too !!!
(This is similar to the T-shirt that says "I spent $350,000 on Scientology and all I got was this lousy T-shirt". I always wanted to have one of those printed up too. Perhaps I'll design something for cafepress and have some shirts printed one of these days.)
Has anyone ever made up some funny or sarcastic certificates for "surviving" any of the various CO$ lectures, congresses or services?
Can I still get software to make certificates? There used to be a number of software titles for less than $20 (children could give their father a "World's Greatest Father" certificate for Father's Day for example). Can I still get software for this that runs on Windows 7? (I refuse to go to Win10.)
I could make the certificate say any funny thing I want. I could give myself a certificate -- for "the heroic action of surviving Hubbard's interminable drivel contained in the Clearing Course", or anything else. EDIT: A watermark, perhaps LRH's head (or the Dianetics/SCN double triangle symbol) or maybe even clipart (used sparingly) could enhance the seriousness, humor, etc. of this certificate.
Heck, I could even make a phony Clear Certificate if I felt like it. I could even attest to OT 9 and 10 !!! (I also refuse to use Roman numbers.)
If I write down a list of phrases in a word processor about the wonderful achievement I have achieved, and another list about how bad the CO$ course, lecture or service was, I could make a whole set of certificates.
Has anybody ever tried this?
ANOTHER EDIT: Using Goldenrod-color paper (and some trumped-up offenses), I could even make my own declare. Other people, who were in the CO$ (I never was) could get some nice closure by printing fake declares too !!!
(This is similar to the T-shirt that says "I spent $350,000 on Scientology and all I got was this lousy T-shirt". I always wanted to have one of those printed up too. Perhaps I'll design something for cafepress and have some shirts printed one of these days.)
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