If I could talk, and you could listen......

[anonomog]

It took a little while. The first week I saw the SP Times interviews I knew that DM was a bad hat. That became very real to me very quickly from my own experiences in the org. I began to lean towards the independents. I started reading Marty's blog and saw that a lot of old friends were there and I read their stories. As I read more and more however I reached a point where I was no longer considering myself an independent but came to the same conclusions that most all of you have. I am done with Scientology. I was tricked and didn't even know it. The thing is that it was a gradient of discovery.

I will never go back to being a Scientologist again but it took a gradient approach.

Thanks for saying that. Welcome to ESMB.
Whatever I feel about Marty, I did hope that his blog would provide a safer place for people to start their own explorations and gain their own understandings, if that was what they were wanting to do. I really did and do have my doubts though.

Having leant that way yourself, do you think it is a valuable resource? If the blog wasn't available would you have gone to Jeff's Leaving Scientology Blog or ESMB immediately, or would that have been too steep a gradient.

 

[Free to shine]

GT what I would say is that a family that can really talk to each other, no holds barred, is a real family. A family that allows we are all different, that having an illness is not a crime, that having different views does not make a person lower than the dirt on your shoe, that "good roads" is a load of shit sometimes. No matter what happens, someone being told to disconnect from another family member should never EVER happen. All those lost years, the celebrations, the issues, the love and the tears of normal life is lost forever when you allow something like scientology to dictate your opinions for you. You are left with a hollow shell and a PR image of "family" that is not real. You have to hide the real issues and growth and caring, because someone else says so.

That is what I would say to (the few left in) my scientology family.

 

[Magoo]

I like to talk openly with my friends who are still in. I wish I had more opportunities to do so. I miss quite a lot of my still-in friends.

Most Exes know that the majority of scientologists (Staff and Public) are good-hearted, well-meaning folk. They are usually bright about most things and have a sense of dedication and duty that other groups probably envy.

There are some who demonise and stereotype scientologists in certain unflattering ways but it's my observation that these are usually people who don't actually know many scientologists. Perhaps it is well to remember that almost every scientologist is/will be one of us, sooner or later.

Sure, there *are* people who behave like assholes in scientology, some spectacularly so, but the majority of people I know are well-intentioned people who are seeking to improve conditions for themselves and others.

In my experience, recognising this and actually talking to them rather than at them is the *only* thing that works.

Well said, Panda! Also, in the times I do get to speak with Scientologists, while speaking with them, I like to ask them a very simple question:

Why is it that *I*, a declared SP and expelled from your church, can invite *any* of you to come speak--and I'll be happy to discuss any issues, yet they cannot? Also, I constantly suggest people read, look, listen and make up their *own* minds----yet in 10 years of being "out"....I've yet to hear*a* member of C of $ say that (look at both sides) OR
come talk. It's usually then that they have to go....but my guess is for ~some~ they're either out, or still thinking about that. I know something similar helped me start thinking.

My best to you all here, and anyone lurking, see my note, please, below my name.



Tory/Magoo

 

[Arthur Dent]

I was thinking today about what I would like to say to someone who is still in. I was thinking about what I would say to someone I care about that is still a true believer. I was thinking about how good it would feel to be totally honest and how much I wish I could be that way. I really feel like they deserve it, but I'm just not sure they can "have" it.

It made me remember something that I used to hear once a year at Miami Org on Auditor's Day. I think maybe some of you here can relate to this. After all we were Scientologists once. We know a bit about how they think and we know a bit about what keeps them in the hamster wheel. So, why is it so hard for them to get how we feel and understand why we left and why we can never put that cat back into the bag?

Every year Kathy Bottorf is "Auditor of the Year" in Miami. Every year she gives a speech. More than a few times she has started her speech like this:

"I really really LOVE Auditors Day. I really really LOVE winning this award. I love it because it's the only time all year long when I get to talk and say whatever I want while you listen and grant me beingness." Then she smiles and nods her head up and down.

The crowd loves it. It's a very cute way to start her acceptance speech. Of course most of the folks attending the event have been audited by her and she is a dear girl and works her ass off for the cult putting in forty plus hours in the chair per week year after year after year.

But that's not what I want to write about.

I was thinking about a really big personal "what if". What if I could talk to a Scientologist and tell them why I left and why I'm not coming back and how I feel about it and what I went through and continue to struggle with and know that they would just listen and not evaluate or invalidate and grant me the right to have my own thoughts and feelings? What if? I mean really.

What if I could just talk and not worry about getting regged or routed to ethics or having reports written or some backchannel dialog taking place that is an alteration of what I feel I am saying and experiencing?

Hey Scientologist! What would I say if I could talk and you would listen? I have a few ideas and tomorrow I'd like to kick them around, as it might prove to be therapeutic.

If anyone would like to chime in, feel free.

Good night for now.

Hi GT! Geez! if that actually happened or was allowed to happen freely maybe we would just want to sign up for what they're sellin'!

One of the first things that "got" me (outside of my own personal encounters of the insanity while in) was the article "What is expected from you as a life long Scientologist." I was restrained about what I would dare to look at on the internet but curiosity got the best of me and I was riveted and felt I could have written that myself. It was my life. It covered a lot of ground so was not easily "dismiss-able" as perhaps one "entheta" incident might be. It was accurate and intelligent and it made me keep looking.


http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthread.php?t=169

I like to talk openly with my friends who are still in. I wish I had more opportunities to do so. I miss quite a lot of my still-in friends.

Most Exes know that the majority of scientologists (Staff and Public) are good-hearted, well-meaning folk. They are usually bright about most things and have a sense of dedication and duty that other groups probably envy.

There are some who demonise and stereotype scientologists in certain unflattering ways but it's my observation that these are usually people who don't actually know many scientologists. Perhaps it is well to remember that almost every scientologist is/will be one of us, sooner or later.

Sure, there *are* people who behave like assholes in scientology, some spectacularly so, but the majority of people I know are well-intentioned people who are seeking to improve conditions for themselves and others.

In my experience, recognising this and actually talking to them rather than at them is the *only* thing that works.

So true Panda. I also miss a lot of people. (And I wonder if they miss me.) The fact that so many scn are well-intentioned and good hearted people is what kept me going for soooo many years while excusing the very bad behavior of the growing number and magnitude of spectacular assholes. That 'formula' just didn't work anymore. Too many good people were crushed by the assholes. It went out of balance.

I think you have to 'un-brainwash' people one at a time. If you can't say too much to someone I find it goes a long way to say "ummm...that's really not right..." when they mention some out-point or injustice....just to plant the seed. I do as much of that as I possibly can to those I know that are still in. Seeds do grow!

 

[Arthur Dent]

I was a Scientologist for forty years. I was a NOTS Auditor/CS at AOLA from 1979-1991. I am no longer a Scientologist. The thing that worked for me was watching the St. Petersburg Times interviews with Amy, Marty, Mike, Jeff, etc.

I could tell that what they were saying was true. They were not nattering but simply telling the truth about what they experienced. After that I read more and more information on the internet. I started reading some blogs that were critical of LRH and watched some interviews with people like Hana Eltringham and Nancy Many and others. Since then I have expanded and have read a dozen books written by ex Scientologists and have now concluded what all of you have concluded.

It took a little while. The first week I saw the SP Times interviews I knew that DM was a bad hat. That became very real to me very quickly from my own experiences in the org. I began to lean towards the independents. I started reading Marty's blog and saw that a lot of old friends were there and I read their stories. As I read more and more however I reached a point where I was no longer considering myself an independent but came to the same conclusions that most all of you have. I am done with Scientology. I was tricked and didn't even know it. The thing is that it was a gradient of discovery.

I will never go back to being a Scientologist again but it took a gradient approach. If someone just started in on bad mouthing the C of S or LRH I would have turned them off immediately. A lot of the comments on this board are hyper critical making up funny names for people who are still in like "Ron Droids" and "Cool Aid Drinkers" and all sorts of vulgarities are tossed about which I now find funny and pretty much agree with but to start off with that on someone who is on the fence would most likely make him go the wrong way and go back to Scientology. I would lead people I loved to look at a less critical website and let them become enlightened. You have to take it a little easy and kind of spoon feed them the information until they get un-hypnotized. It has taken many years for most of them to get into the spot they are in currently. I don't think your'e going to get them out by blasting them using the a lot of the rhetoric found here because it's just too much and too fast.

Welcome, Dean! I hope you'll start a thread in New Member Introductions and tell some stories. I'm sure you've got plenty! And they really are valuable to other wannabe newbies.

 

[Carmel]

I was thinking today about what I would like to say to someone who is still in. I was thinking about what I would say to someone I care about that is still a true believer. I was thinking about how good it would feel to be totally honest and how much I wish I could be that way. I really feel like they deserve it, but I'm just not sure they can "have" it.
<snip>

If your desire to be totally honest with them is motivated by a care factor for them (as opposed to some selfish agenda, which may be at their expense), then you *can* be totally honest with them and they can "have it".

Can you talk about *all* that ya know, right off the bat?.....Probably not. However, there are no limitations when it comes to talking to them about where you are at and why (as opposed to preaching to them or trying to convert them).......They *can* indeed have it, and are usually thankful for it.

 

[Good twin]

Thank you all for your answers. I actually wasn't even thinking of what I would say to get Scientologists out. I was just thinking what would I say that I want them to know about me and my experience.

I did get this chance once. I wrote about it here a year or two ago. Two OT committee members met me for coffee and let me just talk. It was pretty cool. I told them what attracted me to Scientology and what kept me in for thirty years. I also told them that I wouldn't be coming back and why.

I guess in the past couple of years I feel I've grown to understand myself better. I learned so much about Scientology in the first six months after leaving it was overwhelming. I was amazed that ESMB had more info than my academy training or my staff hatting. I call that phase of my decompression "The cat is outta the bag".

Then I started to look outside the cult for some answers about existence. I met some awesome folks who seemed to have attained some sense of peace and/or self awareness that was far superior to any of the OTs or execs I had known in Scientology. I call this my "Meet the Squirrels" phase.

Strangely or maybe not so strangely all roads led me back to me. I really didn't know myself and everything I was looking at or into encouraged me to know and trust myself. I think Scientology might have started off like that with the reference on personal integrity and the creed and the code of honor, but Scientology in practice really doesn't put a person in much of a postion to believe in themself or even to trust themself. It was a seemingly dangerous path and very similar to the popular book and movie "Eat, Pray, Love". It required forgiving myself. It included indulging myself. It opened the door to enjoying myself and being happy for no reason. (another book that helped)

I learned to really value things about myself that had no value while in the cult. I also looked at what I had given up because of the cult and decided what I could or wanted to reclaim. I found quite a bit and I was actually grateful that I had lived in the bubble for thirty years because life had so many new and wonderous experiences for me. I continue to live in this phase of awe and wonder.

But I think about things from when I was still in. Sometimes I remember good times. Mostly I see those days as sort of comical and absurd. I also reconnect with some suppressed emotions when I go there. I let myself feel bad if I feel bad. Sometimes I am able to get good and pissed off and sometimes I cry. It's all part of healing and becoming human again.

I found a few people who knew me before I was a Scientologist. I was amazed at what they remembered about me. It seems that I was always funny and fun and a great story teller. I was always brave and bold and willing to be a leader in adventures large and small. I was always a good listener and insightful and empathetic. I was a good friend long before I learned the comm formula or the basic auditing series. The friends I had lost touch with missed me and are happy to have me back in their lives.

It wasn't until getting through these many (and more) changes that I can look back and see how very very strange the Scientology bubble really is. I remember hearing Exes talk about it and it helped really quite a bit, but there's nothing like walking the walk.

While in, I was so afraid of what would happen if I lost Scientology that I was unable to evaluate what I actually gained from it. The only solution while in that matrix, was to credit EVERYTHING to Scientology. I mean that quite literally. I really believed that the sun came up only because the founder had discovered the truth about the universe and the mind and spirit of man. I had no value as a human being outside of my Scientology experience and knowledge. It would have been impossible to admit I believed that, but it was true.

The actual turning point for me was when Rick died. It wasn't because he died after thrity years of dedicating himself to becoming immortal. It wasn't because he killed himself. It wasn't because someone coulda woulda shoulda known, done something or fixed it. It was just the way we reacted to it. The way we processed it. The way we got through it.

One of the friends I found from my past attempted to do herself in at a very young age. As a teenager I was appalled that her family took great effort to come up with a shore story and prevent any PR flap that might result. I was appalled and full of ideals. I wanted to be part of a world that didn't stick it's head in the sand and lock skeletons in the closet. I joined a cult.

Ironic, isn't it?

 

[Carmel]

Thank you all for your answers. I actually wasn't even thinking of what I would say to get Scientologists out. I was just thinking what would I say that I want them to know about me and my experience.

I did get this chance once. I wrote about it here a year or two ago. Two OT committee members met me for coffee and let me just talk. It was pretty cool. I told them what attracted me to Scientology and what kept me in for thirty years. I also told them that I wouldn't be coming back and why.

I guess in the past couple of years I feel I've grown to understand myself better. I learned so much about Scientology in the first six months after leaving it was overwhelming. I was amazed that ESMB had more info than my academy training or my staff hatting. I call that phase of my decompression "The cat is outta the bag".

Then I started to look outside the cult for some answers about existence. I met some awesome folks who seemed to have attained some sense of peace and/or self awareness that was far superior to any of the OTs or execs I had known in Scientology. I call this my "Meet the Squirrels" phase.

Strangely or maybe not so strangely all roads led me back to me. I really didn't know myself and everything I was looking at or into encouraged me to know and trust myself. I think Scientology might have started off like that with the reference on personal integrity and the creed and the code of honor, but Scientology in practice really doesn't put a person in much of a postion to believe in themself or even to trust themself. It was a seemingly dangerous path and very similar to the popular book and movie "Eat, Pray, Love". It required forgiving myself. It included indulging myself. It opened the door to enjoying myself and being happy for no reason. (another book that helped)

I learned to really value things about myself that had no value while in the cult. I also looked at what I had given up because of the cult and decided what I could or wanted to reclaim. I found quite a bit and I was actually grateful that I had lived in the bubble for thirty years because life had so many new and wonderous experiences for me. I continue to live in this phase of awe and wonder.

But I think about things from when I was still in. Sometimes I remember good times. Mostly I see those days as sort of comical and absurd. I also reconnect with some suppressed emotions when I go there. I let myself feel bad if I feel bad. Sometimes I am able to get good and pissed off and sometimes I cry. It's all part of healing and becoming human again.

I found a few people who knew me before I was a Scientologist. I was amazed at what they remembered about me. It seems that I was always funny and fun and a great story teller. I was always brave and bold and willing to be a leader in adventures large and small. I was always a good listener and insightful and empathetic. I was a good friend long before I learned the comm formula or the basic auditing series. The friends I had lost touch with missed me and are happy to have me back in their lives.

It wasn't until getting through these many (and more) changes that I can look back and see how very very strange the Scientology bubble really is. I remember hearing Exes talk about it and it helped really quite a bit, but there's nothing like walking the walk.

While in, I was so afraid of what would happen if I lost Scientology that I was unable to evaluate what I actually gained from it. The only solution while in that matrix, was to credit EVERYTHING to Scientology. I mean that quite literally. I really believed that the sun came up only because the founder had discovered the truth about the universe and the mind and spirit of man. I had no value as a human being outside of my Scientology experience and knowledge. It would have been impossible to admit I believed that, but it was true.

The actual turning point for me was when Rick died. It wasn't because he died after thrity years of dedicating himself to becoming immortal. It wasn't because he killed himself. It wasn't because someone coulda woulda shoulda known, done something or fixed it. It was just the way we reacted to it. The way we processed it. The way we got through it.

One of the friends I found from my past attempted to do herself in at a very young age. As a teenager I was appalled that her family took great effort to come up with a shore story and prevent any PR flap that might result. I was appalled and full of ideals. I wanted to be part of a world that didn't stick it's head in the sand and lock skeletons in the closet. I joined a cult.

Ironic, isn't it?

Got it, and, yeah!......I'm on the same page, with a lot of this.

Big loves to ya!

 

[Good twin]

Got it, and, yeah!......I'm on the same page, with a lot of this.

Big loves to ya!

Backatcha!

 

[EP - Ethics Particle]

What IS this!

Got it, and, yeah!......I'm on the same page, with a lot of this.

Big loves to ya!

Backatcha!

Is this a LOVE FEST!

If so, I want in on it!

My lap awaits...

EP

 

[Ho Tai]

Summary of my scn life

SP's are the Kryptonite of the Scientologist, to be avoided at all cost.

1. Became scientologist.
2. Had experience with CoS that caused me to wake up and think for myself.
3. Became Kryptonite.
4. Living happily.

The Kryptonite analogy is one of the best things I have read here lately!

 

[Wisened One]

to ESMB, Dean. Looking forward to hearing more of your stories!

GT: Lovin' your stories, about self-discovery. About kinda reconnecting yourself, pre-Scn, during-Scn, post-Scn self. I've been realizing, shedding, adapting, adopting, emoting, so much lately, I need to write it all down and share here soon, too!

One thing I've re-discovered about myself and my life around me, that I had shed when I became a dedicated hard-core scn and staff member: Noticing (and enjoying) Details, again.

Listening to every note of a song, noticing more details of a movie (colors people wearing meaning something (as in the movie Hero, for instance. My SON had to point that fact out to me!!) (vs just skimming and throwing it out as a barrier to my lofty scn goals). Reading something (a book, a post, etc.) more slowly and carefully again. (Tho while a scn student, I'd read that way, too).

SLOWING DOWN and not RUSHING anymore (and getting my husband to do the same, FINALLY!).

Realizing Life is here to be experienced, relished, ENJOYED. And how short it is. So I've been concentrating on doing that more, now. Taking better care of my health, my body than when I was a starving, rushing, anxiety-ridden scn and staff.

Enjoying my family, and my kids and being ever grateful to them for sticking with me through thick and thin!

I've rambled and made no sense...look at me. I'm going now!

 

[Good twin]

You make perfect sense to me Michelle. Love you! <3

 

[Telepathetic]

I was a Scientologist for forty years. I was a NOTS Auditor/CS at AOLA from 1979-1991. I am no longer a Scientologist. The thing that worked for me was watching the St. Petersburg Times interviews with Amy, Marty, Mike, Jeff, etc.

I could tell that what they were saying was true. They were not nattering but simply telling the truth about what they experienced. After that I read more and more information on the internet. I started reading some blogs that were critical of LRH and watched some interviews with people like Hana Eltringham and Nancy Many and others. Since then I have expanded and have read a dozen books written by ex Scientologists and have now concluded what all of you have concluded.

It took a little while. The first week I saw the SP Times interviews I knew that DM was a bad hat. That became very real to me very quickly from my own experiences in the org. I began to lean towards the independents. I started reading Marty's blog and saw that a lot of old friends were there and I read their stories. As I read more and more however I reached a point where I was no longer considering myself an independent but came to the same conclusions that most all of you have. I am done with Scientology. I was tricked and didn't even know it. The thing is that it was a gradient of discovery.

I will never go back to being a Scientologist again but it took a gradient approach. If someone just started in on bad mouthing the C of S or LRH I would have turned them off immediately. A lot of the comments on this board are hyper critical making up funny names for people who are still in like "Ron Droids" and "Cool Aid Drinkers" and all sorts of vulgarities are tossed about which I now find funny and pretty much agree with but to start off with that on someone who is on the fence would most likely make him go the wrong way and go back to Scientology. I would lead people I loved to look at a less critical website and let them become enlightened. You have to take it a little easy and kind of spoon feed them the information until they get un-hypnotized. It has taken many years for most of them to get into the spot they are in currently. I don't think your'e going to get them out by blasting them using the a lot of the rhetoric found here because it's just too much and too fast.

Welcome Dean

I completely agree with you, the leaving process is done gradually and if "hit to hard" a person will not listen due to the indoctrination he/she has received over the years.

It takes time to readjust and not everyone takes the same time. So, in dealing with those who are still in, patience, understanding and kindness is, from my experience, the key.

Again welcome and great to have you here!

TP

 

[Telepathetic]

Thank you all for your answers. I actually wasn't even thinking of what I would say to get Scientologists out. I was just thinking what would I say that I want them to know about me and my experience.

I did get this chance once. I wrote about it here a year or two ago. Two OT committee members met me for coffee and let me just talk. It was pretty cool. I told them what attracted me to Scientology and what kept me in for thirty years. I also told them that I wouldn't be coming back and why.

I guess in the past couple of years I feel I've grown to understand myself better. I learned so much about Scientology in the first six months after leaving it was overwhelming. I was amazed that ESMB had more info than my academy training or my staff hatting. I call that phase of my decompression "The cat is outta the bag".

Then I started to look outside the cult for some answers about existence. I met some awesome folks who seemed to have attained some sense of peace and/or self awareness that was far superior to any of the OTs or execs I had known in Scientology. I call this my "Meet the Squirrels" phase.

Strangely or maybe not so strangely all roads led me back to me. I really didn't know myself and everything I was looking at or into encouraged me to know and trust myself. I think Scientology might have started off like that with the reference on personal integrity and the creed and the code of honor, but Scientology in practice really doesn't put a person in much of a postion to believe in themself or even to trust themself. It was a seemingly dangerous path and very similar to the popular book and movie "Eat, Pray, Love". It required forgiving myself. It included indulging myself. It opened the door to enjoying myself and being happy for no reason. (another book that helped)

I learned to really value things about myself that had no value while in the cult. I also looked at what I had given up because of the cult and decided what I could or wanted to reclaim. I found quite a bit and I was actually grateful that I had lived in the bubble for thirty years because life had so many new and wonderous experiences for me. I continue to live in this phase of awe and wonder.

But I think about things from when I was still in. Sometimes I remember good times. Mostly I see those days as sort of comical and absurd. I also reconnect with some suppressed emotions when I go there. I let myself feel bad if I feel bad. Sometimes I am able to get good and pissed off and sometimes I cry. It's all part of healing and becoming human again.

I found a few people who knew me before I was a Scientologist. I was amazed at what they remembered about me. It seems that I was always funny and fun and a great story teller. I was always brave and bold and willing to be a leader in adventures large and small. I was always a good listener and insightful and empathetic. I was a good friend long before I learned the comm formula or the basic auditing series. The friends I had lost touch with missed me and are happy to have me back in their lives.

It wasn't until getting through these many (and more) changes that I can look back and see how very very strange the Scientology bubble really is. I remember hearing Exes talk about it and it helped really quite a bit, but there's nothing like walking the walk.

While in, I was so afraid of what would happen if I lost Scientology that I was unable to evaluate what I actually gained from it. The only solution while in that matrix, was to credit EVERYTHING to Scientology. I mean that quite literally. I really believed that the sun came up only because the founder had discovered the truth about the universe and the mind and spirit of man. I had no value as a human being outside of my Scientology experience and knowledge. It would have been impossible to admit I believed that, but it was true.

The actual turning point for me was when Rick died. It wasn't because he died after thrity years of dedicating himself to becoming immortal. It wasn't because he killed himself. It wasn't because someone coulda woulda shoulda known, done something or fixed it. It was just the way we reacted to it. The way we processed it. The way we got through it.

One of the friends I found from my past attempted to do herself in at a very young age. As a teenager I was appalled that her family took great effort to come up with a shore story and prevent any PR flap that might result. I was appalled and full of ideals. I wanted to be part of a world that didn't stick it's head in the sand and lock skeletons in the closet. I joined a cult.

Ironic, isn't it?

It is ironic indeed that we became,to some degree, that which we detested.

I had the same disgusting feeling when I was told of a friend who, was on OTVII, and had recently died of a rare illness. The first thing out of the Scientologist mouth-- that informed me of his death-- was, " But, he was doing spiritually very well!"

One could detect the anxiety in the voice of this Scilon. Not sorrow for the lost of a friend but a need perhaps, not to convince me so much as to convince herself that those exaggerated claims made by Hubbard were still true.

TP

 

[Telepathetic]

Is this a LOVE FEST!

If so, I want in on it!

My lap awaits...

EP

I don't know if I want to sit on your lap EP but, I'll give you a great big hug!

TP

 

[Kathy (ImOut)]

GT, thanks for the insight. I just might have to branch out to my before Scn friends and get an idea of who I was before Scn and see if I've gotten back to that point.

 

[freethinker]

Did I say that was the only way? Did you hear that?

I speak to scientologists regularly and they hear me.
The only way to get *anyone* to really hear what you're saying is to speak in a way that will be heard.
Did you "hear" that?

 

[Stat]

I wanted it (Dn&Scn) to be true so bad from the get go.. because it's such a great hope....

I even had a minor "psychotic break" back in the early 90's when just joined (I locked myself in a bathroom for 25 minutes or so and just cried hard, emotional me.
I guess combination of lacking B1 in my system and trying to convince myself that Scn is not another scam, even if profound this time.)

Almost 20 years later, I am here and have no regrets. I learned a lot, even if hard way.

And still learning.

 

[I told you I was trouble]

GT what I would say is that a family that can really talk to each other, no holds barred, is a real family. A family that allows we are all different, that having an illness is not a crime, that having different views does not make a person lower than the dirt on your shoe, that "good roads" is a load of shit sometimes. No matter what happens, someone being told to disconnect from another family member should never EVER happen. All those lost years, the celebrations, the issues, the love and the tears of normal life is lost forever when you allow something like scientology to dictate your opinions for you. You are left with a hollow shell and a PR image of "family" that is not real. You have to hide the real issues and growth and caring, because someone else says so.

That is what I would say to (the few left in) my scientology family.