Marriage on the rocks

[Kerry]

You can't just go around putting people in untenable situations then say they're totally responsible for the condition they're in...because it begs the question "what about CofS- what about THEIR responsibility?" - Claire

What an excellent reminder. Concerned's wife's husband's not "pulling it in," all by himself if he ever was. Sounds like his sister and boss did a pretty good job. My hubby'd never heard of it. An old school friend pulled/regged him into looking at it in such a heavy-heavy sell at a vulnerable moment in his life. Came back long after he'd left to try to put the squeeze on again. After all is said and done - and there's a lot I'm not saying - the stupid bitch is still too chicken to meet me. She's still in in a big big way.

The other person to "facilitate" his original pull-in, an ex-friend of BADBOP (biggest, affect-deficient bitch on the planet) got in touch with me out of the blue shortly after that painful few months, turns out she'd blown and was a great help to our sit after it was settled. Still great friends with her to this day and often see her and her gorgeous children. Her children were not those of her Scieno partner - who personality-tested Her in during Her vulnerable moment. Etc.

The last post that concerned wife posted here said she was going to talk to her husband.

She hasn't been back - Lulubelle

I hope she is okay. Such a full-on cult town to be in, too.

There are 2 Scientologys. - Alanzo

This is exactly right. I was dealing with someone who was thinking a part of the 1st Scientology could offer some relief. I was feeding him information about the 2nd, eventually gritting my teeth trying to be "pleasant."

If someone can acknowledge the visible (but subordinate, in the Scientological scheme of things) "better parts," while also acknowledging the not so visible (and corrupting), there is a chance that someone, fascinated with only the "better parts," can be reached.

If one is aghast (understandably) at the sheer rottenness behind the displayed part of Scientology, and cites only the rotten part, then the already difficult task of reaching, or influencing, someone who is "in" becomes almost impossible, at least in the short run. - Veda

Beautifully put.

So part of Concerned wife's "mission" is to find out just how deeply her husband has been in with the cult behind her back. It sounds salvageable, but only just. Yeah, I hope she comes back and lets us know how she's doing, but it just might be too hard for her right now, and being in lurk mode may be what she needs. Waving to her if she's reading.

 

[Bea Kiddo]

CONCERNED WIFE:


YOU ARE ALWAYS WELCOME HERE.

If you ever need help, feel free to post. Or if any member seems to be someone you would like to talk to more privately, who you think may be able to help the best, you can always send a private message to that person. Look up on the top right of the screen and in blue you will see "Private messages". Click on it and it will help you to send a message to anyone on this board.

There are many people here who would love to help and support you.

And you are also welcome to lurk. Hang out a while. Get to know us. Peace.

 

[Tanstaafl]

I'll second that.

CONCERNED WIFE:


YOU ARE ALWAYS WELCOME HERE.

If you ever need help, feel free to post. Or if any member seems to be someone you would like to talk to more privately, who you think may be able to help the best, you can always send a private message to that person. Look up on the top right of the screen and in blue you will see "Private messages". Click on it and it will help you to send a message to anyone on this board.

There are many people here who would love to help and support you.

And you are also welcome to lurk. Hang out a while. Get to know us. Peace.

 

[Colleen K. Peltomaa]

Just try what I've suggested. Don't try "to open his eyes". Don't worry about past hostility, that is gone. You can't undo the past. Just try to be as calm and reasonable as you can. It might not work and he may get deeper into Scientology, but criticism probably won't work either!

The less stress he feels from you, the more open he will be to compare the situation and make a good choice for you as well as for him.

Good luck.

Make sure you're having lots of fun and activity without him.

 

[Lulu Belle]

There are 2 Scientologys.

The one you joined, and the one that is formed around you when you become a Scientologist.

You continue to operate in the first Scientology without realizing that the second one has surrounded you.

You keep looking around at all these weird things going on around you saying, "That's not Scientology!" But it is. It's the 2nd Scientology.

You keep looking for the 1st Scientology, the one you read about in all the basic books and heard about in all the intro lectures, sure that it is around here somewhere.

But it's not. It's only in your head.

The real Scientology, the 2nd Scientology, the one that is actually practiced, has nothing to do with ARC or granting beingness. That was only used to appeal to your ideals, and to your emotions, to hook you and get you to join.

I'm sorry to say that, Taansy.

But that explanation is the only thing that makes any of it make sense to me.

There are 2 Scientologys.

And, being good, you still believe in the 1st one.

Alanzo, much as I hate to say it, you are brilliant.

 

[Free to shine]

Alanzo, much as I hate to say it, you are brilliant.

Yep, he just has a way of putting those words together! That's such an excellent outline I am keeping it for future use.

 

[Alanzo]

Alanzo, much as I hate to say it, you are brilliant.

Lulu?

Is the LSD kicking in again?

Otherwise, thank you for saying that. I used to watch all these robots walk down LRH Way and I just could not figure it out. Until I realized that. Then it all finally made sense to me.

 

[Lulu Belle]

Lulu?

Is the LSD kicking in again?

Actually, I never took it.

Unfortunately for me.

If I had, I never would have had all of those glorious experiences of being in The Group That Is Saving The Planet.