What WEre You Doing Right About Now, When You WERe...

[Cinnamon_Girl]

What were you doing, right about now, when you were in the SO or on staff? Seeing as how it's Christmas Eve, what do you remember as your Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?

I literally had no life or decent place to go, even much of a decent home to go home to. And I recall a feeling of total isolation from the "real" world and the rest of the non-Scientologist part of the world.

 

[Mest Lover]

the events they scheduled to promote re-hashed old hat in a new package and saying how much better it was than it had ever been before. Yah, that was fun! new books, new e-meters, new re-vitalized tech. blah! get me home to my family who loves me was all I was thinking, why am I here.

 

[Ladybird]

Xmas in the Sea Org is hard to remember. We rarely got cards or any presents from the outside. Now that I am out I have discovered that my family did send cards and presents I never got.

I recall getting my hand slapped for sneaking a peice of brie off the public buffet one year, and another year when I was in the RPF we got to play around in the kitchen, Matteo Galbiati made us Tiramisu...later all we got was 15 minutes for dinner and a face rip by the RPF I/C Alex Meyer.

Alex's twin brother is/was security at Flag. Their parents were Flag public, always struggling to get up the bridge, couldn't keep a schedule and could never get enough money. I heard their mother died a few years ago. She always limped, she was very short and very overweight. I don't know if it was her weight or polio or something else.

BTW, there is no such thing as "enough" time OR money for scientology. The only reason they use Xmas and have the floats and Santas and event stuff is for PR and recruitment. RPF slaves set all that Xmas crap up for free.

 

[Cinnamon_Girl]

So Sad

Xmas in the Sea Org is hard to remember. We rarely got cards or any presents from the outside. Now that I am out I have discovered that my family did send cards and presents I never got.

I recall getting my hand slapped for sneaking a peice of brie off the public buffet one year, and another year when I was in the RPF we got to play around in the kitchen, Matteo Galbiati made us Tiramisu...later all we got was 15 minutes for dinner and a face rip by the RPF I/C Alex Meyer.

Alex's twin brother is/was security at Flag. Their parents were Flag public, always struggling to get up the bridge, couldn't keep a schedule and could never get enough money. I heard their mother died a few years ago. She always limped, she was very short and very overweight. I don't know if it was her weight or polio or something else.

BTW, there is no such thing as "enough" time OR money for scientology. The only reason they use Xmas and have the floats and Santas and event stuff is for PR and recruitment. RPF slaves set all that Xmas crap up for free.

So sad.
This "church" of scientology is nothing but a slavery organization. Slavery is not against the law in the U.S.

I get so saddened when I read how badly people were, and are treated in the SO and staff. And to think that right now as we are reading this and writing on this forum, there are people being abused in that organization.

 

[Wisened One]

I may have been with my family if I CSW'd early enough and my stats were good and my guilt didn't choke me outta going...otherwise, I would've been on Call-In, maybe bookselling or bodyrouting on the streets if my Front Line weren't teeming with new blood to reg.

But NOT doin' that no more! I'm hosting a party right now for my mil and laughing and enjoying family and friends!

http://i672.photobucket.com/albums/vv89/wisenedone/Joan%20Wentling/100_0444.jpg

http://i672.photobucket.com/albums/vv89/wisenedone/Joan Wentling/100_0445.jpg

 

[smartone]

Xmas in the Sea Org is hard to remember. We rarely got cards or any presents from the outside. Now that I am out I have discovered that my family did send cards and presents I never got.

That is so frigging evil. Makes me so mad.

 

[Cinnamon_Girl]

Sad

That is so frigging evil. Makes me so mad.

That is very sad.

Once my mother mailed money to me at the org (not a good idea), but she did. The HCO opened it without even telling me that they would.

This is a huge violation of personal boundaries. Nowadays I may have done something about it. But back then, I didn't even know what my own personal boundaries were. And they wouldn't respect them even if I told them.

Isn't that a Federal crime? Tampering with mail is a very very bad thing.

 

[Gottabrain]

An RPF Love Story

One of the best Christmases I ever had in the SO (when I wasn't on LOA) was on the RPF, believe it or not.

I was falling in love with Duncan Grant. He was my friend. He was kind, compassionate, understanding... and he had that adorable NZ/Aussie accent. And he was adorable to me.

Duncan knew I was having a rough go on the RPF. I've never done well in confinement, but I had enemies on the RPF for reasons which I did not understand at the time. Plus I had already completed FPRD before I ever started, so the continued FPRD, plus confinement, plus extra harassment, was breaking me down.

We took my son out on Christmas morning and went to breakfast in Hollywood. We walked on Hollywood or Sunset. We kissed. Not passionately, nicely. Neither one of us wanted the other in trouble.

On Christmas morning, 1985, Duncan and I fell completely in love. We never had any sort of sexual relationship, not even deep kissing. But we held hands plenty. We would have married under different circumstances.

Fate being what it was, and love being what it is, I knew Duncan did not belong there. I knew he could get off the RPF. I convinced him to get a Board of Review. He didn't want to - he wanted to stay with me. He was worried about me and knew I needed him, needed his friendship, his love. But I did not want to stay in the Sea Org. I couldn't tell him that I had already decided. And I didn't. Duncan got his Board of Review and was off the RPF. I went through worse, but eventually routed out.

Christmas 1985. Duncan is still in. I've been out all these years. And I will always love Duncan for the compassionate, wonderful friend he was to me then (and very nearly much more than that). I hope some of you can understand that, even though he is in Int Mgmt now.

 

[I told you I was trouble]

That, Gottabrain is a lovely story (if very sad).

I hope Duncan gets out one day ... no-one deserves that life.

 

[thetanic]

Gottabrain, that's a sad and yet wonderful story: that you two were able to have a nice moment on the RPF counts for a lot.

 

[Wisened One]

What a heartfelt and yet sad story, Gotta! I hope that one day soon perhaps you and Duncan reunite and are in each others' life from then on..(in whatever positive way it may be).

One of the best Christmases I ever had in the SO (when I wasn't on LOA) was on the RPF, believe it or not.

I was falling in love with Duncan Grant. He was my friend. He was kind, compassionate, understanding... and he had that adorable NZ/Aussie accent. And he was adorable to me.

Duncan knew I was having a rough go on the RPF. I've never done well in confinement, but I had enemies on the RPF for reasons which I did not understand at the time. Plus I had already completed FPRD before I ever started, so the continued FPRD, plus confinement, plus extra harassment, was breaking me down.

We took my son out on Christmas morning and went to breakfast in Hollywood. We walked on Hollywood or Sunset. We kissed. Not passionately, nicely. Neither one of us wanted the other in trouble.

On Christmas morning, 1985, Duncan and I fell completely in love. We never had any sort of sexual relationship, not even deep kissing. But we held hands plenty. We would have married under different circumstances.

Fate being what it was, and love being what it is, I knew Duncan did not belong there. I knew he could get off the RPF. I convinced him to get a Board of Review. He didn't want to - he wanted to stay with me. He was worried about me and knew I needed him, needed his friendship, his love. But I did not want to stay in the Sea Org. I couldn't tell him that I had already decided. And I didn't. Duncan got his Board of Review and was off the RPF. I went through worse, but eventually routed out.

Christmas 1985. Duncan is still in. I've been out all these years. And I will always love Duncan for the compassionate, wonderful friend he was to me then (and very nearly much more than that). I hope some of you can understand that, even though he is in Int Mgmt now.

 

[Gottabrain]

It is not so sad, really. Some things are meant to be, some not. We never could get together in the same time & place. Lol!! Like some sort of cosmic joke when we tried a few times, years later. And now he's in my country and I'm in his. WEIRD!!!!! God has a strange sense of humour, but there's really no other way to look at it.

Some you love pass through your life, some stay longer, some forever. Some you meet again. But how much richer has my life been for those I loved and who loved me. I was very fortunate I had Duncan when I did on the RPF. Many others had no one.

When everything else is stripped away, not everyone turns into angry animals foaming at the mouth. What brings out the worst in some can also bring out the best in others. And sometimes, even bringing out the worst in others brings things to the surface so they can be ultimately be resolved.

How does that quote go? "There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us, that it ill behooves any of us to speak ill of the rest."

I'm glad you enjoyed my story. But really, it is not meant to be sad. We WILL say G'day again, I'm sure.

 

[FinallyFree]

What were you doing, right about now, when you were in the SO or on staff? Seeing as how it's Christmas Eve, what do you remember as your Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?

I literally had no life or decent place to go, even much of a decent home to go home to. And I recall a feeling of total isolation from the "real" world and the rest of the non-Scientologist part of the world.

Trying desperately to sneak out without getting in trouble so I could see my Mom before she went to bed Christmas Eve.

 

[Gottabrain]

Awwww Finally Free! That is so sad.

How are you and your mother now?